Hi good reader. I hope you enjoy this post, but to be honest, I just need to to get my head straight after the biggest few weeks of whatever you can call my comedy "career",
If we cut straight to the facts, I'm 0-2 on major comedy contests, and the last show I produced was the least attended so far. This has taught me that stand up is really hard, not immediately (if ever) profitable, and an emotional roller coaster.
On the other hand, those "failures" were all very fun and educational, with some of the best moments and biggest laughs I've had so far.
I looked back, and I audio-recorded my first set in August 2017. I really thought it had been longer than that. I consider this the start of "Chapter 1" of my time in comedy. Anything before that is prologue, because I was really just dabbling. Stand up was something I'd do once every month or two, just often enough to feel like I was doing "it". Once I started recording myself, and more importantly, listening to and learning from those sets, it got real. I had intention and motivation to be better. There are 30 sets on my phone since then, and probably at least 5 that I didn't record.
I've been pushing myself since then. Taking gigs out of town. Writing new stuff and honing and polishing the best of it. Hosting shows, and eventually producing my own show. Last but not least, I entered a couple of big contests that would show me where I stood against other comics at roughly the same experience level as me.
My contest sets, despite being some of the best ones I've had so far, didn't get me past the first rounds. I realized that, despite all the growth I've had, that I was just another amateur in the scene. I wasn't some undeniable talent that was ready for bigger chances. I'm not at the bottom of the pile, but there are dozens of people in this province that are further along than me. That was...humbling.
I realized that these contests were the end of Chapter 1 of this journey. Everything I've spent the last year working on was at least partially to show well at them. To determine if I have a future at this, or if I'm fooling myself.
I'm still trying to figure out what the answer is to that. I did OK, and I've come a long way so far. I'm a lazy writer, but I feel good about my ability to find the funny in a premise and distill it down to a solid bit. As a performer though, I have a long way to go. I haven't found my "voice" yet. My personal delivery style that will maximize laughs. I'm reasonably proud of my stuff, but I'm not selling that to the crowd.
That much I've figured out. The thing I'm struggling with now is, "Now what are you going to do about it?" After my Edmonton contest, the headliner Sterling Scott dropped a great piece of advice for all of us who were stinging from defeat. "You didn't start doing comedy just to win this contest. Don't let tonight define you. Let it REFINE you." I get where he's coming from, but it's been really difficult figuring out what that means for me.
Do I scrap what I've got so far and completely change direction, or do I lean into what's working and tweak the rest? Do I keep my delivery dry and slightly smug, or do I get more animated? Am I putting enough of "me" into this? Being fearless and honest with what I want to say? Am I overthinking all of this and forgetting to have fun?
I either don't know or don't like the answers to those right now.
If I've learned anything so far, (and the more I learn the more I realize I know nothing), it's that "talent" is a fraction of what it takes to do this well. It's not really about who the funniest person is at my level right now. It's about the person who kept their head down and pushed for 5, 10 or even 15 years. Grinding it out. Taking risks. Staying confident while always striving to improve. The folks who love the craft of it all. Because there are no promises in show business. It's not a meritocracy, even though artists always wish it was. It's who's hustling, and who's making it about the process instead of the always-elusive destination.
I'm not a patient guy, but there's no shortcuts for this. There's a very real chance that I could come back every year for the next 5 and never win one of those contests. But that's the point. I can't make that the goal. The only way to do this "right", is to only compare me to me. To tackle those questions above and come out the other side stronger and more confident in who I am as a comedian.
I haven't won a damn thing yet, but I haven't failed until I quit.
On the other hand, those "failures" were all very fun and educational, with some of the best moments and biggest laughs I've had so far.
I looked back, and I audio-recorded my first set in August 2017. I really thought it had been longer than that. I consider this the start of "Chapter 1" of my time in comedy. Anything before that is prologue, because I was really just dabbling. Stand up was something I'd do once every month or two, just often enough to feel like I was doing "it". Once I started recording myself, and more importantly, listening to and learning from those sets, it got real. I had intention and motivation to be better. There are 30 sets on my phone since then, and probably at least 5 that I didn't record.
I've been pushing myself since then. Taking gigs out of town. Writing new stuff and honing and polishing the best of it. Hosting shows, and eventually producing my own show. Last but not least, I entered a couple of big contests that would show me where I stood against other comics at roughly the same experience level as me.
My contest sets, despite being some of the best ones I've had so far, didn't get me past the first rounds. I realized that, despite all the growth I've had, that I was just another amateur in the scene. I wasn't some undeniable talent that was ready for bigger chances. I'm not at the bottom of the pile, but there are dozens of people in this province that are further along than me. That was...humbling.
I realized that these contests were the end of Chapter 1 of this journey. Everything I've spent the last year working on was at least partially to show well at them. To determine if I have a future at this, or if I'm fooling myself.
I'm still trying to figure out what the answer is to that. I did OK, and I've come a long way so far. I'm a lazy writer, but I feel good about my ability to find the funny in a premise and distill it down to a solid bit. As a performer though, I have a long way to go. I haven't found my "voice" yet. My personal delivery style that will maximize laughs. I'm reasonably proud of my stuff, but I'm not selling that to the crowd.
That much I've figured out. The thing I'm struggling with now is, "Now what are you going to do about it?" After my Edmonton contest, the headliner Sterling Scott dropped a great piece of advice for all of us who were stinging from defeat. "You didn't start doing comedy just to win this contest. Don't let tonight define you. Let it REFINE you." I get where he's coming from, but it's been really difficult figuring out what that means for me.
Do I scrap what I've got so far and completely change direction, or do I lean into what's working and tweak the rest? Do I keep my delivery dry and slightly smug, or do I get more animated? Am I putting enough of "me" into this? Being fearless and honest with what I want to say? Am I overthinking all of this and forgetting to have fun?
I either don't know or don't like the answers to those right now.
If I've learned anything so far, (and the more I learn the more I realize I know nothing), it's that "talent" is a fraction of what it takes to do this well. It's not really about who the funniest person is at my level right now. It's about the person who kept their head down and pushed for 5, 10 or even 15 years. Grinding it out. Taking risks. Staying confident while always striving to improve. The folks who love the craft of it all. Because there are no promises in show business. It's not a meritocracy, even though artists always wish it was. It's who's hustling, and who's making it about the process instead of the always-elusive destination.
I'm not a patient guy, but there's no shortcuts for this. There's a very real chance that I could come back every year for the next 5 and never win one of those contests. But that's the point. I can't make that the goal. The only way to do this "right", is to only compare me to me. To tackle those questions above and come out the other side stronger and more confident in who I am as a comedian.
I haven't won a damn thing yet, but I haven't failed until I quit.
I'm not ready to stop yet. Bring on Chapter 2...
B
