This past weekend was a massive one for me, personally and "professionally". Spoilers: This is going to be a long one.
Sunday was Father's Day, and I was able to decompress from a big few weeks and really connect with my three kids. I have realized that I tend to be guilty of tunnel vision when it comes to my comedy. Anything that isn't that thing tends to get shoved aside a little. It's something I'm working on, but at least for on Sunday, I was able to put the previous night in the rear view and let nothing steal my energy and attention from my family. I had to work, but after, we had some burgers and went to a movie. After the show, I made an effort to have a few private moments with each kid, making sure they know how much I love them and how proud I am of them every day, even if I'm not always the most present dad. Even writing this now, I'm getting a little misty. They are so great.
Bear is fourteen now, and is so fearlessly independent. I've never seen so much sense of self in someone that age. He's a bit moody and distant sometimes, but, fourteen. That'll happen. The fact that he is willing to spend any time with the family at all is wonderful.
Bug is eleven now. She's had some social issues in school this year, but middle school has never been easy. She's so thoughtful and really wants everyone to be ok. Hugs from Bugs are the best hugs.
Mr. C just turned eight. I'll admit, he just hasn't gotten as much hands-on attention as the older two received at the same age. It shows a bit, as he's had focus issues and isn't doing as well at school. I know I need to buckle down and spend more time reading with him, and limiting his screen time. He's so charming, kind and sensitive, and I want to work harder to help him become the best person he can be.
They are so great in fact, that I've often told myself that they are fine if I'm too busy or distracted to give them much of my full attention. And along those lines, part of why they are such great kids is that for the first half of their lives, I gave them so much more. I want to get back to that with them. My family is my main source of my comedy, because they really are my world. The best reward for my awesome Saturday night was some great moments with my crew.
Why was my Saturday so awesome? Mostly because I did a show that leveled up my comedy "career" in almost every possible way.
One of Canada's best comedians, Simon King messaged me out of the blue about putting a show together at The Penholder Tavern. I had never met him, but had tons of respect for both his smart and intense comedy, and his tremendous resume.
To this point, all the shows I've produced have been free with donation. But because Simon was travelling in from Vancouver, and was looking to do over an hour, something this special had to be a ticketed event. I had been looking to try a ticketed show anyway, so getting to attempt it with someone like Simon was a no-brainer. He also asked if I'd like to open for him, despite probably having little info about how I am as a comic. He said I could do twenty five minutes, which freaked me out. I fought the urge to say "why?" and went with "definitely!"
I've only done more than ten minutes a couple of times, and have done so many five and seven minute spots that anything close to that length was terrifying. So I brought in my comedy hetero-life partner Zachary Landry to host and to take some of that time off of my shaky hands.
So now I'm heading into a show with some high stakes. Biggest name I've ever worked with. Longest set I've attempted. Promoting a show that's not free. I knew if things didn't pan out it wouldn't be the end of anything, just another lesson, but I really wanted to pull this off. I knew that no matter how my set went, that Simon would have the crowd leaving happy. I just had to get the crowd in the room in the first place. I wanted to make Simon happy that he took the chance to reach out to me.
Sales started slow, but we sold the place out. I was scrambling last minute to add tables and chairs for everyone, and we were standing room only for the last six walk ups.
So that part went great. Now it was show time. On all of my shows in Penhold, I spend so much mental energy making sure the show isn't a disaster that I barely get to worry about what I'm going to do up there. This time, that was liberating! One of the biggest flaws I've had as a comedian is that I would just plow through my material like a joke robot.
"these are my jokes. please enjoy my humour..."
But this time I kept things loose, I stayed in the moment and let the crowd dictate where my set went. I ended up doing almost twenty minutes, and at least two-thirds of it was decent. It was almost a bit too loose and sloppy for a "pro middle" set, but the most important thing is that I had a blast, and the crowd seemed to as well. I know that not every room will be as forgiving as my "home club", but I gained a lot of confidence that I can handle more time and am ready to keep doing those longer sets.
Of course, as predicted, Simon King blew the roof off and everyone's minds. He went almost ninety minutes, which if you've seen him, means he told over three hours of jokes. I knew he was a great comedian, but it was also great just to meet him and to spend time with the guy. He was gracious and easy to work with every step of the way. He also treated Zachary and myself like peers, even though the two of us would never put ourselves in the same sphere as Simon. We all had a couple of chances to share a drink and talk shop, (with a surprise appearance by Andrew Albert, who I am also looking forward to working with) and those moments were as educational and rewarding as the show itself was.
Simon was very complimentary about the whole thing, and wants to do more together, which I'm excited about. Everything was a massive win, and has me so motivated to keep grinding. The work I've put in to build the Penholder room has been totally worth it. The people I've met and the things I've learned are only fueling the fire to do more. My biggest challenge now is not to get too ahead of myself. Things won't blow up overnight. I know that, so I'm just going to keep my head down and keep learning. I'm just enjoying the ride so far.
Keeping with the Father's Day theme, the best side-effect about the whole Penhold experience has been how it's changed my relationship with my dad. He put the feelers out to the bar owner in the first place to get things rolling. He had never seen me do stand up at that point. Just blind faith in his boy. Fast forward six months and five shows, and he's had as much fun in that room as anyone else. He's meeting my friends and fellow comics, and telling anyone in the bar who'll listen how proud he is. He and I weren't in a great place when I was younger, but I know now that at least some of that was him seeing me looking lost, trying to find me jobs, only to have me struggle and get fired time and time again. He just wanted me to find my thing.
I think I finally have, and having him be part of that makes it even better.
I love you dad. Happy Father's Day.
B
