A Health Wrinkle

So, I went in to get a referral on my shoulder issues, and that meant running some tests. Most of the tests came back great, except my blood test came back with an issue.

I have diabetes.

Feels weird to type. Feels weird to say. I'm not used to it yet. 

Don't get me wrong. I knew something was coming. I eat mostly garbage and am probably 20 (Okay 40) pounds overweight. But I always thought the heart attack was going to be what got me. My dad's had 2. Both grandfathers had them. But nope. You know how some people have ice in their veins? Apparently I have Slurpee. 

I make jokes, because that's what I do, but this sucks. I'm scared. I'm angry. There's a ton I don't know yet. (My meeting with the diabetes nurse is pending.) At this point, the doctor said I don't need to monitor levels yet or need medication, so that's good. But I have to stop eating all the things I eat. All of 'em. Hot dogs, burgers, nachos, beer, and Pepsi. All gone. Just like pasta, pretty much all bread, donuts, sugar in my coffee, white rice. Oh, and my wife is the best baker I know. Sigh...

So...yeah. I'm pretty much in mourning for the old me right now. It's okay if you don't have a lot of pity. I know this is not the sexiest or most dramatic of conditions. It's the "take better care of yourself fatty" of diseases. I have to be a healthy person now. This had made me feel pretty vulnerable and fragile, but I have a concrete reason to work harder. There's stakes now. Getting healthy was always a vague "it would be nice to look and feel better" thing, but now it's a "I like my feet and being able to see" thing. I don't want this to get me. I want to be here for my family, and not just here, but functional. The doctor was very clear that diet and exercise can eliminate all symptoms of diabetes. So that's where we're at. I have to educate myself, make changes, and be disciplined. Those things haven't been my jam in the past, but I will put in the work. 

Thanks for putting up with my pity party. Carry on. 

B