Good Times!

Whew! I am a mess today. Monday is being like, "alright. That'll do. Time to adult again." This week should be interesting, because by comparison to everything that just happened, it probably won't be. Let's recap shall we?


Last Sunday, I started work at 6 in the AM then met up with some friends and headed up to Edmonton to see ACDC. Saw some old friends, some of whom I haven't seen in eight years or so. It was great to catch up with the guys, most of whom are adulting regularly now. Definitely not like the old days. The concert was outdoors. September in Alberta is...unpredictable. It was cold, and it rained hard for almost the entire show. The crowd was soaked and so were the bands. A few people left early to go warm up. I thought about doing that too, but if a bunch of senior citizens can rock the hell out for 2.5 hours in those conditions, I figured I should cowboy up and stick it out. I'm so glad I did, because DAMN! ACDC was amazing. The last time I saw them was fifteen years ago. They weren't exactly kids then, so I had my doubts that they still had the goods. I've never been happier to be wrong. If this is the last ride for that epic band, then they are going out on top of their game. I salute you, ACDC.

Not a bad way to start the week, but it kept getting better. I took my last week of holidays so I could focus on Sketchfest. More on that later, but having more free time meant I could participate in cool stuff I normally don't have time to do. My favorite "bonus event" was heading down to The Hub to teach improv to a group of special needs folks. It's so inspiring to see people that struggle to do basic tasks push themselves to try to play along with us. Aaron has severe disabilities, and can't really move or speak, but he still worked hard to say something to keep our word association game moving. He didn't want to just sit back and watch. He wanted to play too. So he did. And it was awesome. He's also a ringer at musical chairs, and had the rest of us fighting for second place. Torin has Down Syndrome, and didn't fully understand everything we attempted. But that wasn't going to stop him from getting in there with us, trying his best and having a ton of fun doing it. It's impossible not to be inspired by such brave and honest people. That crew pushes me to improve in the best possible way. They are always ecstatic to see Jason, Scott or myself roll in for a session, and we are just as thrilled to be there. I can't imagine a better way to spend a Tuesday afternoon.

Two days after that, was the first night of Alberta's first ever sketch comedy festival, Sketchfest. Such a cool thing to be part of! Bullskit called in our extended family of comedians, and several answered the call. Not only did Bullskit and Vealskit represent, but we had three other sketch duos formed by current or former Bullskitters. Along for the ride was our favorite naughty ladies The Dirrty Show. Plus the two greatest groups in Calgary, The Kinkonauts and The Late Late Breakfast Show. Plus the funniest man in Calgary, Trevor Campbell! PLUS the handsome and talented duo known as .38 Delight, who joined us all the way from Los Angeles! That's right. Red Deer hosted an international sketch comedy festival. Suck it Edmonton!

Sketchfest ran over three long but amazing nights. Seeing how different groups approach the medium was really educational, and Trevor in particular lit off fireworks in my head about what comedy can be. And amazingly, they were all wonderful people! We had over 30 talented and creative people putting this show together all week, and there was not a hint of drama to be found. My Vealskit crew was voted best musical sketch, which was huge considering the level of talent we were battling. The event also included a special "Sketch-U-Bator" after the Friday show, where all the performers blew off some steam, had some drinks, and performed some stuff for each other that we aren't sure a "normal" crowd would be on board with. Indescribable fun. My big takeaway from the festival was "make the things you wish existed."  Matt Dale came back from Toronto with ideas of how awesome a sketch festival would be, so with the help of Jenna Goldade and Jeremy Robinson, he started one. It can be that easy.

I stayed up far too late Saturday night, getting to know the people that came out to create this thing with us. No regrets on that, but Sunday morning came early as Wifey and I packed the kids up to head up to Edmonton for the Comic Expo. All of us had fun and found things to geek out about. Mr. C had his first taste of comic-con fun, and he loved it. Nothing is cooler than watching a five-year-old experience seeing people walk around dressed like his heroes, and games, toys and books as far as his eyes can see. We left that night broke and exhausted, like you're supposed to.

And that was my best week since Baby C arrived. To quote Kanye West, (which is always fun to do),

"I'm dope and I do dope $#!t!"

Go be dope,

B

When "Cats In the Cradle" stops being just a song.

I'm back! Sorry about the delay. Life happens, you know? One of the biggest things on my mind over the last couple of weeks has been my kids. With school now in session, I'm discovering that I actually miss them! We had a great summer together, but I was excited about having a little alone time in the morning before work. And that has been good. But all of the sudden though, there never seems to be enough time. That first hour of the day is pretty go-go, and I don't get home most weeknights until after nine. That ends up being all business too. At best we squeeze in a quick bedtime story and snuggle Mr. C to sleep. It ends up being the best part of my day, because I don't really get any time with them on the weekends either.

What I've also realized, is that our family is seeing a big shift. We've been parents for over a decade now, and the youngest kid is five. For most of our time so far, it's been "firsts". First birthday, first scary ride at the fair. first sleepover, and so on. And yeah, I know the "firsts" are far from over, but I'm starting to see the "lasts" creeping in. We just sent our last child to kindergarten. A couple of our friends have babies, and I got a pang of sadness when I realized that I'll never feel the sheer bliss of holding my newborn child ever again. Never have a tiny person that I MADE fall asleep on my chest anymore. On the other side of the coin though, I guess I've changed my last diaper. So I guess not all "lasts" are terrible, huh?

Overall, the important thing I'm focusing on is appreciating the moments I do get with them. The last ten years seem to have flown by, and I know that's only going to get worse. At the moment, I have three sweet, amazing kids who ACTUALLY want to spend time with me. I have to constantly remind myself how fleeting that is. I love my little people, exactly how they are. The hard part is accepting that "how they are" will constantly change for as long as I'll be around to see it.

"I don't know when, but we'll get together then",
B

You suck. So do I. And that's OK.

After my first couple of attempts at doing stand-up, I messaged a friend of mine to bounce some thoughts off of him about the process of it all. I was riding pretty high going into our chat. The main reason why is that people are so paralyzed by the thought of getting up in front of a crowd in such a vulnerable way that being able to do it at all felt like a major triumph. And frankly, the crowds were very kind to me, so things were feeling a bit too easy. My friend Erik was quick to caution me to stay focused and humble. He said "most of the folks you'll be sharing the stage with will suck. And you do too. And I do too. You just keep at it and eventually you won't suck." Then he tossed out a quote from a very wise cartoon dog.

He also mentioned that eventually, you're going to bomb. And that bombing is not a bad thing, because it will keep you grounded and show you exactly why you suck, and the parts of your act you need to change so that you'll suck less. 

It turns out he was dead on, because last week, I got my first taste of bombing. I went up first, which it turns out is WAAAAAY harder than a cushy spot towards the end of the show. It's up to the "bullet" spot to get the crowd relaxed and ready to laugh. I did not succeed at that. I mumbled my way through my first bit, and looked out to a small crowd of dead faces. Not even a cracked smile. Right here is where a pro would make a crack about how bad the last joke was, or at least regroup and come at them even harder. I did not succeed at that either. Instead I tightened up and showed fear. This is a cardinal sin for anyone on stage, because the crowd usually starts feeling bad for you, and nobody laughs when they feel like that. I spewed the rest of my set out, in the most rushed and tentative way possible. Then the host mercifully lit me, meaning it was time to wrap it up. Thank you Clint! And Jeebus. Thank you Jeebus!

I was shaking as I sat back down. I felt shame and embarrassment. Two full scoops worth. For the rest of the night, I was stewing over what went wrong. By the next morning though, I was OK with how things went. More than OK actually. Going up there and sucking knocked me off of that smug little cloud I'd been on. It shattered my illusions about how I was actually doing, and reminded me that making strangers laugh on command is F#%$ing HARD. I learned that I need to tighten up my set, figure out what hits and make it even better. I also need to dump what isn't hitting, and write better stuff. And no matter what, I need to be able to fail up there with total relentless confidence no matter how ugly it gets. 

I embraced the suck.

This lesson applies to pretty much everything. If you aren't failing, you aren't trying. Put yourself out there. Blow up your comfortable little bubble and try something you've always wanted to do. Don't worry about how you're going to do, because I'll tell you right now: It's probably going to go terribly. And that's awesome. Dust yourself off and do it again. And again. And again. If you love something, don't let failure discourage you, let it push you. 

I'm going to do another open mic next week. I'm probably going to suck. The week after that, my second season with my improv troupe, Bullksit starts up. I REALLY suck at that too. 

And I can't wait.

Suckfully yours,

B

What did I just click on?

Hi! Thanks for coming. Seriously. The internet is a vast and desolate place, so I appreciate you spending your wasted time here. I'll try to prove worthy.

Let me take a second to introduce myself. My name's Brad (if you hadn't figured that out). I consider myself an passionate amateur in the following categories:

-Husband
 (to an amazing woman I will refer to here as Wifey)

-Father of three to:

 -Bear (my oldest son. He's a tween that delights in trolling everyone within range when not nose-deep in a video game. Bear is also funnier than most people. Including me)

 -Bug (the middle one. Bug is everybody's little mommy, whether they think they need another one or not. She is also the sweetest creature in the universe)

 -Mr. C (formerly Baby C. The youngest and most precocious of my offspring. I think he wants to be Batman when he grows up. That doesn't bode well for me. If Mr.C ever fully harnesses his powerful charm, everyone's in big trouble)

-Comedian/Writer/Performer/Improvisor
   (this category is mostly new. For most of the last two decades I dabbled in writing that didn't have much in the way of intention. But less than two years ago I fell in with Bull Skit Comedy (link at the bottom). First as a volunteer, then as a sketch writer and eventually a cast member. It has been an incredible ride so far with those talented and giving people. Through them, I've grown more confident and willing to push myself to keep learning and growing. Recently, that's included trying my hand with doing stand up at some open mic nights)

-And now blogger. You're reading this so it's official.                                                                            
In fact, the only thing I'd consider my self a professional at is being a nerd. I've had a lifetime of experience with that one. It helps that the gig that pays the bills is as an electronics salesman. I was raised on a steady diet of comic books and science fiction. I love all types of games, from poker to tabletop, role playing to video. I also started liking basketball in junior high to appear cooler. It didn't work, but I still love it anyway. Born and raised in Central Alberta, Canada. Mostly in the Red Deer area other than a couple of years in Calgary.

Still here? Sweet. Now that the formalities are out of the way, let's get to the good stuff...

What's this blog going to be about?

The truth is, I'm not precisely sure yet. The great thing about working in this format is that what this is will grow and change over time. My priorities will shift. Different things will inspire me. For now though, I see myself focusing on the following subjects:

Family
Without my wife and children, none of the other stuff would matter as much. I plan on talking about my experiences as a parent and husband.

Rants and Raves
I like stuff. I love talking about stuff even more. Music, movies, pop culture, TV, current events, maybe even some politics.

Getting better
I don't know if I'm warming up for my mid-life crisis or not (pretty soon I can't say I'm in my mid-thirties anymore), but I'm trying to improve myself. Get healthier. Lose some weight. Properly channel my creativity. Keep finding and beating new challenges. Keeping a positive attitude. Being more unselfish and more attentive to the important people in my life. Like most of us, it generally doesn't go great all the time. But I'm trying. Sometimes my posts here will be mainly just to keep me on the right path. Hopefully it helps others that are on that path as well.

Improv, Stand Up and Sketch Comedy
The stuff I'm trying to master. Through learning how to do these things, I'm also discovering a lot about myself. A big part of why I decided to start this blog was to document my journey in these fields. One of two things will happen: Either you'll see a guy go from small-time to rich and famously successful, or more likely you'll see a guy enjoy the hell out of staying small-time. Whatever happens, it should be a fun ride.

There's a lot of things I'm going to try to deliver here, but I'm not going to be fool enough to promise them. I want this blog to be funny, entertaining, thoughtful and inspiring. Hopefully, some of the time at least, it will be. But what I DO promise to give you here is honesty. Good, bad or just plain boring, this blog is going to be me. I consider myself an earnest dude. Possibly delusional, but sincere.

Thanks again for getting this far, and hopefully we see you here down the line.

Later,

B
BullSkit Comedy